Do you know what happens when there is a rain and wind storm at the beginning of February in Minnesota?
You wake up in the middle of the night in a dead panic CONvinced that the sounds you hear is a burglar crawling around in your air ducts or an escaped murderer dancing an Irish jig in your attic. This leads to frantic texting of family members to see if someone, anyone, is awake at 3:00am and willing to calm you down over the phone. When that fails, you turn on the light and poke at the cat until she yawns herself awake so you don't feel completely alone. After the soothing music you've turned on has absolutely no effect on drowning out the dark and stormy night noises you turn your ceiling fan up to high so it sounds like a jet is taking off in your bedroom. That almost helps but not quite enough so you reach into your Catholic roots and start whispering Hail Mary's, hoping the repetition will lull you to sleep. Bingo. They work like a charm; better than Nyquil or Tylenol PM.
I don't know how anyone ever manages to stay awake for a full rosary...
2.10.2009
2.09.2009
Full moon madness
Usually I keep a few drafts of posts ferreted away for days when my brain says to me, "You cwazy" when I ask it to help me be creative first thing in the morning. It said that and more to me today but unfortunately, I have no back up posts waiting in the wings.
So, all I've really got for you is that I am positive the full moon was messing with my cat. Every three hours she woke me up by dropping things on my face (hair clips, bottle caps, bobby pins) and then promptly stole my pillow and passed out as soon as my alarm went off. My oatmeal turned into an inedible brick at breakfast so I had to stick with just drinking my chai.

I may or may not have skipped the whole shower thing this morning (don't worry, I smell good and my hair looks decent thanks to deodorant, perfume and some dry shampoo.)It is supposed to be raining all day and best part about that it will be perfect weather for the movie night I have planned with the girls after work.
That is all. Adieu.
Sidenote: If you need something amusing to start your Monday out right, (more amusing than my non-substantial attempt at writing) check out this post. Gotta love kid humor!
So, all I've really got for you is that I am positive the full moon was messing with my cat. Every three hours she woke me up by dropping things on my face (hair clips, bottle caps, bobby pins) and then promptly stole my pillow and passed out as soon as my alarm went off. My oatmeal turned into an inedible brick at breakfast so I had to stick with just drinking my chai.

I may or may not have skipped the whole shower thing this morning (don't worry, I smell good and my hair looks decent thanks to deodorant, perfume and some dry shampoo.)It is supposed to be raining all day and best part about that it will be perfect weather for the movie night I have planned with the girls after work.
That is all. Adieu.
Sidenote: If you need something amusing to start your Monday out right, (more amusing than my non-substantial attempt at writing) check out this post. Gotta love kid humor!
2.06.2009
Things I love right NOW
It has been a while since a Friday round-up of "Things I love right NOW" so here you go folks...enjoy!
If you want to see a cute impression of a duck, Anne's blog is the place to go. Oh, Lil, how I adore you...
Most of the world has a crush on the president's wife, Lady O. After checking out this picture I'm pretty sure you will too. It's making me have serious flash backs to high school dances.
If I was the tattooing type, I might think about getting something cool like this, maybe with Sister? Hmm...
Ever had someone say to you, "Wow, I just never pictured you guys as being such close friends" ? I have. To them, I say, "PSHA! Check THIS out."
Ok, so, I have a penchant for shows involving medicine. Probably has something to do with those years I spent working in the back of an ambulance, but watching Private Practice I fell in love with the song Devil's Thunder by Rachel Cantu. Listen to it on her myspace page. Trust me.
And last, I have joined Twitter! I'm not sure that I love it yet, but hopefully I'll get swept up in the excitement soon.
If you want to see a cute impression of a duck, Anne's blog is the place to go. Oh, Lil, how I adore you...
Most of the world has a crush on the president's wife, Lady O. After checking out this picture I'm pretty sure you will too. It's making me have serious flash backs to high school dances.
If I was the tattooing type, I might think about getting something cool like this, maybe with Sister? Hmm...
Ever had someone say to you, "Wow, I just never pictured you guys as being such close friends" ? I have. To them, I say, "PSHA! Check THIS out."
Ok, so, I have a penchant for shows involving medicine. Probably has something to do with those years I spent working in the back of an ambulance, but watching Private Practice I fell in love with the song Devil's Thunder by Rachel Cantu. Listen to it on her myspace page. Trust me.
And last, I have joined Twitter! I'm not sure that I love it yet, but hopefully I'll get swept up in the excitement soon.
2.05.2009
Blond
Grandma Doris had extra credit card points that had to be used up on magazine subscriptions. Katie was in charge of picking out who got which ones and every week for a few months a new publication showed up at my house.
me: hey, i got Coastal Living in the mail today
sister: yeah? cool.
me: kate...where do I live?
[pause]
sister: OMG i didn't even think of that! HAHAHA
me: yup, in the midwest.
sister: seriously, omg
me: its ok. we have lakes. lakes have coasts. kinda.
sister: totally counts.
Sidenote: Ok I have to admit that I had a bit of a moment myself when I tried to put this post up this morning...I put the post date as 2008 and I accidentally spelled "Blond" with an e at the end. Awesome.
me: hey, i got Coastal Living in the mail today
sister: yeah? cool.
me: kate...where do I live?
[pause]
sister: OMG i didn't even think of that! HAHAHA
me: yup, in the midwest.
sister: seriously, omg
me: its ok. we have lakes. lakes have coasts. kinda.
sister: totally counts.
Sidenote: Ok I have to admit that I had a bit of a moment myself when I tried to put this post up this morning...I put the post date as 2008 and I accidentally spelled "Blond" with an e at the end. Awesome.
2.04.2009
Eau de Schezuan
me: i smell like chinese food.
friend: on purpose?
me: yeah its a new perfume i'm trying out. my bvlgari was just too normal so i thought i'd dabble in asian cuisine
friend: well, find a guy to give some feedback
friend: maybe he'll say "mmm, you're making me drool for all the wrong reasons"
me: i'd be afraid he would get confused by the smell and try to tip me
me: not like that would be degrading or anything
friend: well, he might use chopsticks, at least
me: how polite!
friend: we at least need a name for your new fragrance
me: eau de schzechuan?
friend: Take Out Empress
friend: oooh, better--Schezchuan Concubine
friend: on purpose?
me: yeah its a new perfume i'm trying out. my bvlgari was just too normal so i thought i'd dabble in asian cuisine
friend: well, find a guy to give some feedback
friend: maybe he'll say "mmm, you're making me drool for all the wrong reasons"
me: i'd be afraid he would get confused by the smell and try to tip me
me: not like that would be degrading or anything
friend: well, he might use chopsticks, at least
me: how polite!
friend: we at least need a name for your new fragrance
me: eau de schzechuan?
friend: Take Out Empress
friend: oooh, better--Schezchuan Concubine
2.03.2009
25+
I've been tagged in about a million of those "25 random things" posts and notes on facebook so here we go, my 25+ random things. (I was going to try to do 100 like Dolce but wasn't feeling ambitious enough so...44 it is!)
1. It is physically impossible for me to go to a movie without eating Sour Patch Kids.
2. When I drink tequila I cry.
3. There is a bridge over the Mississippi that always makes me wonder what it would feel like to fall into the river when I drive over it, but I don't want to find out.
4. My handwriting is only good if I do caps with a skinny marker.
5. Wearing heels makes me feel prettier.
6. Singing along at concerts scares me because I'm afraid I'll forget the lyrics.
7. I've never felt safer than when I go to Mass.
8. For a few weeks I get addicted to a song and listen to it almost exclusively over and over again before moving on to my next obsession.
9. I can't remember the last time I slept through the night.
10. I think hippos are cute, like giant pugs or bulldogs.
11. Plants die the minute I bring them home.
12. Changing the toilet paper roll is really hard for me to remember to do.
13. Grocery store clerks hit on me every time I shop.
14. Praying makes me fall asleep.
15. Babies fall asleep when I hold them; my arms are like a drug.
16. 3 meals a day doesn't work for me: I need more like 17.
17. When I'm reading a good book I can have entire conversations and not remember a word I've said.
18. Insurance commercials make me cry on a regular basis.
19. Dressing up is easy but trying to look casually cute is nearly impossible for me.
20. In high school I had joint custody of a leopard gecko named Phoenix who was born on 9/11/01.
21. The smell of tuna makes me gag.
22. Most of my best friends have known me since I was 8.
23. Every year of the first day of class since I was in kindergarten I've eaten oatmeal for breakfast.
24. If I were stranded on a desert island and could have three foods I'd pick bread, olives and cheese.
25. Having long nails makes me feel dirty, but not in a good way.
26. I hate the smell of smoke, probably because I grew up with it.
27. Once I got arrested and I still don't talk about it.
28. I believe that any religion that teaches love contains some truth.
29. When I was in 4th grade they diagnosed me with a heart condition but I figured out later it was really panic attacks.
30. Closing my eyes and putting my head back on a plane during take off is one of my favorite feelings ever.
31. I've never made out in the backseat of a car or in a movie theater but have always wanted to.
32. I've left parties early because there were no cute guys.
33. My house is always messy.
34. Reading magazines makes me feel frivolous so I only do it while I'm working out to cancel out the feeling.
35. At 16 years old my best friend and I got into a car accident and I told everyone that I was driving my car; they believed me but she was the one driving.
36. Asking boys to dances at my all girls high school has made me unafraid to approach men I think are good looking, but I still prefer it when they come to me.
37. The only drawing I've ever won was at a staff meeting where I got Gopheropoly (a U of MN version of Monopoly).
38. While bartending on the Mississippi I found a dead body floating in the river.
39. My sister makes me wish I was blonde but I am too pale to pull it off.
40. If I can afford having lots of kids I'd like to have a whole passel of 'em.
41. Without at least 8 hours of sleep every night and a snack every few hours during the day I turn into a crabby monster.
42. I hoard gift certificates until I find something really special to buy but by then I've usually lost them.
43. Listening to old music makes me want to wear aviator sunglasses.
44. I don't like ending on normal numbers (my alarm is set for 6:37am.)
1. It is physically impossible for me to go to a movie without eating Sour Patch Kids.
2. When I drink tequila I cry.
3. There is a bridge over the Mississippi that always makes me wonder what it would feel like to fall into the river when I drive over it, but I don't want to find out.
4. My handwriting is only good if I do caps with a skinny marker.
5. Wearing heels makes me feel prettier.
6. Singing along at concerts scares me because I'm afraid I'll forget the lyrics.
7. I've never felt safer than when I go to Mass.
8. For a few weeks I get addicted to a song and listen to it almost exclusively over and over again before moving on to my next obsession.
9. I can't remember the last time I slept through the night.
10. I think hippos are cute, like giant pugs or bulldogs.
11. Plants die the minute I bring them home.
12. Changing the toilet paper roll is really hard for me to remember to do.
13. Grocery store clerks hit on me every time I shop.
14. Praying makes me fall asleep.
15. Babies fall asleep when I hold them; my arms are like a drug.
16. 3 meals a day doesn't work for me: I need more like 17.
17. When I'm reading a good book I can have entire conversations and not remember a word I've said.
18. Insurance commercials make me cry on a regular basis.
19. Dressing up is easy but trying to look casually cute is nearly impossible for me.
20. In high school I had joint custody of a leopard gecko named Phoenix who was born on 9/11/01.
21. The smell of tuna makes me gag.
22. Most of my best friends have known me since I was 8.
23. Every year of the first day of class since I was in kindergarten I've eaten oatmeal for breakfast.
24. If I were stranded on a desert island and could have three foods I'd pick bread, olives and cheese.
25. Having long nails makes me feel dirty, but not in a good way.
26. I hate the smell of smoke, probably because I grew up with it.
27. Once I got arrested and I still don't talk about it.
28. I believe that any religion that teaches love contains some truth.
29. When I was in 4th grade they diagnosed me with a heart condition but I figured out later it was really panic attacks.
30. Closing my eyes and putting my head back on a plane during take off is one of my favorite feelings ever.
31. I've never made out in the backseat of a car or in a movie theater but have always wanted to.
32. I've left parties early because there were no cute guys.
33. My house is always messy.
34. Reading magazines makes me feel frivolous so I only do it while I'm working out to cancel out the feeling.
35. At 16 years old my best friend and I got into a car accident and I told everyone that I was driving my car; they believed me but she was the one driving.
36. Asking boys to dances at my all girls high school has made me unafraid to approach men I think are good looking, but I still prefer it when they come to me.
37. The only drawing I've ever won was at a staff meeting where I got Gopheropoly (a U of MN version of Monopoly).
38. While bartending on the Mississippi I found a dead body floating in the river.
39. My sister makes me wish I was blonde but I am too pale to pull it off.
40. If I can afford having lots of kids I'd like to have a whole passel of 'em.
41. Without at least 8 hours of sleep every night and a snack every few hours during the day I turn into a crabby monster.
42. I hoard gift certificates until I find something really special to buy but by then I've usually lost them.
43. Listening to old music makes me want to wear aviator sunglasses.
44. I don't like ending on normal numbers (my alarm is set for 6:37am.)
2.02.2009
"Hello, Gerentology speaking..."
I keep getting wrong calls asking for the Gerontology department and it is getting really old. (Badum ching!)
I can't decide if that is better or worse than the two month spree when every other call I answered was looking for the Urology office but regardless, it is annoying. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy old people. Two of my favorite people in the world are over 90 years old: next door neighbor Vi, who turns 95 this year and is the most avid Twins baseball fan I've ever met and Grandma Doris, who is actually 85 but lies and says she is 91 in order to get people to think she looks great for her age. Still, I'm hopeful the webmaster will be able to fix the wrong phone number listed on othe website and I won't have to field my calls anymore. Ah, gerontology...
I can't decide if that is better or worse than the two month spree when every other call I answered was looking for the Urology office but regardless, it is annoying. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy old people. Two of my favorite people in the world are over 90 years old: next door neighbor Vi, who turns 95 this year and is the most avid Twins baseball fan I've ever met and Grandma Doris, who is actually 85 but lies and says she is 91 in order to get people to think she looks great for her age. Still, I'm hopeful the webmaster will be able to fix the wrong phone number listed on othe website and I won't have to field my calls anymore. Ah, gerontology...
1.30.2009
Lost and confused
Sometimes I'm an airhead. Usually only when I have lots of very important things flying through my head but sometimes just because. This week has been a combination of the two. I'll give you three examples:
Example 1
After work I decide to go to Target. I need some essentials (grapes, tights, and an eye shadow brush) but pulling into the parking lot I remember that I hate running errands at 5:00 when the rest of the workforce is doing the exact same thing. Circling the aisles I give up and park at the end of a row, far far away from the door. Walking through the automatic doors I grab a cart. Since when did Target revert to using metal carts? I thought they were all red plastic? Then,
standing in the middle of the door, blocking traffic, I finally notice the giant sign on the wall ahead: CUB FOODS.
I let go of my cart like it had become electrically charged, put my head down and slumped my way to the exit. Pretty sure the cop at the door was suspicious of my guilty look but believe me, sir, you have no idea what that shame was all about.
Example 2
I forgot my phone at home. That alone is a sign that I am not myself. All day I felt naked and abandoned but the real trouble started when I stopped at the mall on my way home. Without my phone, I have no clock, so I had to keep asking strangers, "Do you have the time?" I am positive at least 75% of them thought I was hitting on them and I'm not surprised; I heard once that asking for the time was the most successful pick-up line guys use. Only I'm not a guy. Whatever.
Example 3
For six months I've been taking classes in the same building on campus, parking in the same building, and using the same skyway to get to my lectures. One night, however, I parked, walked through the skyway and just kept walking right on past the stairs I should have taken. When I finally look around I find myself in the middle of the business school. Now, I heard that women make up less than 20% of today's MBA candidates. At that moment wearing my bright red peacoat in the midst of swarm of dark suits, I believed it. I found the closest stairs, bolted down them, and still couldn't figure out how to get back to my building. I stopped at the security desk and that is the point where if I could have cued some harp music in the background I would. "Oh-my-hot-security-guy" is all I could think. One word to describe his brown eyes: dreamy. It's a good thing after asking him for directions I found a sign pointing to my building because he had no idea what he was talking about. Maybe he fell a little bit in love with me, too? Perhaps being lost and confused isn't all bad...
Example 1
After work I decide to go to Target. I need some essentials (grapes, tights, and an eye shadow brush) but pulling into the parking lot I remember that I hate running errands at 5:00 when the rest of the workforce is doing the exact same thing. Circling the aisles I give up and park at the end of a row, far far away from the door. Walking through the automatic doors I grab a cart. Since when did Target revert to using metal carts? I thought they were all red plastic? Then,
standing in the middle of the door, blocking traffic, I finally notice the giant sign on the wall ahead: CUB FOODS.
I let go of my cart like it had become electrically charged, put my head down and slumped my way to the exit. Pretty sure the cop at the door was suspicious of my guilty look but believe me, sir, you have no idea what that shame was all about.
Example 2
I forgot my phone at home. That alone is a sign that I am not myself. All day I felt naked and abandoned but the real trouble started when I stopped at the mall on my way home. Without my phone, I have no clock, so I had to keep asking strangers, "Do you have the time?" I am positive at least 75% of them thought I was hitting on them and I'm not surprised; I heard once that asking for the time was the most successful pick-up line guys use. Only I'm not a guy. Whatever.
Example 3
For six months I've been taking classes in the same building on campus, parking in the same building, and using the same skyway to get to my lectures. One night, however, I parked, walked through the skyway and just kept walking right on past the stairs I should have taken. When I finally look around I find myself in the middle of the business school. Now, I heard that women make up less than 20% of today's MBA candidates. At that moment wearing my bright red peacoat in the midst of swarm of dark suits, I believed it. I found the closest stairs, bolted down them, and still couldn't figure out how to get back to my building. I stopped at the security desk and that is the point where if I could have cued some harp music in the background I would. "Oh-my-hot-security-guy" is all I could think. One word to describe his brown eyes: dreamy. It's a good thing after asking him for directions I found a sign pointing to my building because he had no idea what he was talking about. Maybe he fell a little bit in love with me, too? Perhaps being lost and confused isn't all bad...
1.29.2009
Monkeying around
Sister and I work hard but everyone needs a little mental break sometimes, right? Today ours came in the form of drawing each other monkeys. Don't ask why, just embrace it.
Cal's monkey face

Kate's monkey face (with a body attached...and heart feet...she's always been a show off.)

Oh and if you want to draw me a monkey (or any other fun little animal) email it to me at cjconney@gmail.com and I'll totally post it...or just keep it to enjoy for myself. One of the two. (C'mon Jonas...I know you're out there with your crazy little comic sketches!)
Cal's monkey face

Kate's monkey face (with a body attached...and heart feet...she's always been a show off.)

Oh and if you want to draw me a monkey (or any other fun little animal) email it to me at cjconney@gmail.com and I'll totally post it...or just keep it to enjoy for myself. One of the two. (C'mon Jonas...I know you're out there with your crazy little comic sketches!)
Ebbiversary
OK so once in a while I mention Ebbie but I generally don't gush because I don't want to sound like a crazy cat lady. This post is the exception...
Two years ago I decided I wanted a cat so I found an endearingly ugly little diluted tortie on petfinder, packed up my roommates and headed off to the humane society. The minute I picked up that cat I knew it wasn't meant to be mine so up and down the aisles of cages we went, peering in at sad little whiskers and noses. One after another was brought out for me to hold and play with but none felt right. Then, in the bottom right corner beind thin metal bars a small black cat with white paws and a milk mustache stood up and cried at me. "I think that cat is talking to me," I whispered.
"I think you're a little bit crazy," my roommate whispered back. While I was olding her in the crowded room a boy with Downs, about 12 years old, came up to me and asked, "Is that your cat?"
"Not yet but I think I'm going to keep her."
"Good," he said decisively. "It's a good cat. That is a very good cat. Very good." And that was that. As I signed the papers a volunteer came up and tapped me on the shoulder. He thanked me for picking that pint sized tuxedo cat and told me that because of her age (she was 6 at the time) and because she had been in the shelter so long she was on the schedule to be put down soon. Her past owners had gotten a kitten and when Ebbie didn't get along with the newcomer she was shipped off to the humane society. Whatever doubts I'd had before disappeared and we packed up and headed home.

1/28/07-Busted napping on Ebbie's first day home, she was already attached to my side
Before I even knew that T.S. Eliot insists all cats must have three names, Ebbie had already morphed into Ebony Fifi Manolo which to this day is what gets shouted when she has one of her naughty moments. For the most part she is the sweetest six pound creature you will ever meet and and has turned quite a few cat-haters into lovers.
She meets me at the door, licks my forehead when I'm sick, and sleeps tucked under my arm next to my chest like a teddy bear. When I talk to myself she cocks her head to the side. If I am sitting, she is in my lap. She runs to the door to greet me when I come home and gives me an earful about having left her. I can't move from room to room without my black shadow behind me and underfoot but I wouldn't have it any other way.

1/28/09-Still my little snuggle bug
Two years ago I decided I wanted a cat so I found an endearingly ugly little diluted tortie on petfinder, packed up my roommates and headed off to the humane society. The minute I picked up that cat I knew it wasn't meant to be mine so up and down the aisles of cages we went, peering in at sad little whiskers and noses. One after another was brought out for me to hold and play with but none felt right. Then, in the bottom right corner beind thin metal bars a small black cat with white paws and a milk mustache stood up and cried at me. "I think that cat is talking to me," I whispered.
"I think you're a little bit crazy," my roommate whispered back. While I was olding her in the crowded room a boy with Downs, about 12 years old, came up to me and asked, "Is that your cat?"
"Not yet but I think I'm going to keep her."
"Good," he said decisively. "It's a good cat. That is a very good cat. Very good." And that was that. As I signed the papers a volunteer came up and tapped me on the shoulder. He thanked me for picking that pint sized tuxedo cat and told me that because of her age (she was 6 at the time) and because she had been in the shelter so long she was on the schedule to be put down soon. Her past owners had gotten a kitten and when Ebbie didn't get along with the newcomer she was shipped off to the humane society. Whatever doubts I'd had before disappeared and we packed up and headed home.

1/28/07-Busted napping on Ebbie's first day home, she was already attached to my side
Before I even knew that T.S. Eliot insists all cats must have three names, Ebbie had already morphed into Ebony Fifi Manolo which to this day is what gets shouted when she has one of her naughty moments. For the most part she is the sweetest six pound creature you will ever meet and and has turned quite a few cat-haters into lovers.
She meets me at the door, licks my forehead when I'm sick, and sleeps tucked under my arm next to my chest like a teddy bear. When I talk to myself she cocks her head to the side. If I am sitting, she is in my lap. She runs to the door to greet me when I come home and gives me an earful about having left her. I can't move from room to room without my black shadow behind me and underfoot but I wouldn't have it any other way.

1/28/09-Still my little snuggle bug
1.28.2009
Mop bucket mess

Sometimes I'm a little bit of a mess, but aren't we all? I'm not the kind of mess where you can hear breaking glass, see scattered pickles, and smell vinegar. Plus if you miss the signs of that kind of mess, there is always a "spill on aisle 4" announcement. I tend to be a mop bucket kind of mess. Once the mop bucket has been used and sits unattended for a while, all of the ugly stuff sinks to the bottom but the top layer actually looks pretty clean. You can see through to the plastic sides and if you get close to it the smell of lemons still floats around from the days of fresh water. The problem comes when someone walking by accidentally bumps the bucket. Sediment filled with ickiness floats to the top and all memory of lemony clean disappears.
At this point, let's just say no one has kicked my mop bucket yet but I feel like it might be coming. There are just enough scummy worries floating around in me that even a minor shake up could get a bit smelly and clouded.

I'm a generally hopeful person so I believe that I could wake up tomorrow and the mop bucket feeling could be gone. I'm so optimistic that I bought a pair of sandals today even though it is maybe zero degrees outside. Who knows? It could warm up to 70 this week. I could win a Caribbean cruise on the radio! Either one would be a treat but really, I'd just like to be back to no dirt and fresh lemons: pre-spill clean up on aisle 4.
Photos from Google images
1.27.2009
Don't sleep on park benches
Baby brother studied abroad this fall and Dad had some very good departure and return trip advice for him like "You should take your passport," and "Don't forget to bring your luggage back with you." When I studied abroad he told me, "Just make sure not to sleep on any park benches." Why would my father give me this sage advice?
About two weeks before packing up and skipping the country I went out on a Thursday night with the roommates to our usual joint. After a lovely evening of dancing with my $7 refillable plastic cup I decided to head home early so that my 6:30am alarm clock for work wouldn't be too painful. The girls wanted to stay until bar close so I hitched a ride home with a friend. Being the gentleman he is, the car sped off almost before my feet hit the pavement so by the time I got to my front door, looked at my teensy clutch purse and realized I had no keys there was no one to help me out. One girl had stayed home so I knocked and knocked and rang the doorbell repeatedly for about fifty gazillionteen minutes but to no avail. Then I started calling people; anyone really. After the roommates ignored my calls, I started in on anyone who might be awake but there was no answer.
Finally I gave up, grabbed a blanket someone had left on the porch couch after a household "pour your guts out over a bag of microwave popcorn and some candles" talk, and laid down to wait for the others to get home. The next thing I know the awful 6:30am alarm was going off and I was still on the porch, still locked out. Knocking incessantly actually worked this time and I was finally let into my own house.
Yes, when the girls came home they stumbled their way right past me without even noticing there was a human shaped lump under the blanket. The whole incident made me wonder if we would even have known if a homeless person was living on our porch. It also made my father tell me not to sleep on any park benches in Europe. Good advice, Dad. Good advice.
About two weeks before packing up and skipping the country I went out on a Thursday night with the roommates to our usual joint. After a lovely evening of dancing with my $7 refillable plastic cup I decided to head home early so that my 6:30am alarm clock for work wouldn't be too painful. The girls wanted to stay until bar close so I hitched a ride home with a friend. Being the gentleman he is, the car sped off almost before my feet hit the pavement so by the time I got to my front door, looked at my teensy clutch purse and realized I had no keys there was no one to help me out. One girl had stayed home so I knocked and knocked and rang the doorbell repeatedly for about fifty gazillionteen minutes but to no avail. Then I started calling people; anyone really. After the roommates ignored my calls, I started in on anyone who might be awake but there was no answer.
Finally I gave up, grabbed a blanket someone had left on the porch couch after a household "pour your guts out over a bag of microwave popcorn and some candles" talk, and laid down to wait for the others to get home. The next thing I know the awful 6:30am alarm was going off and I was still on the porch, still locked out. Knocking incessantly actually worked this time and I was finally let into my own house.
Yes, when the girls came home they stumbled their way right past me without even noticing there was a human shaped lump under the blanket. The whole incident made me wonder if we would even have known if a homeless person was living on our porch. It also made my father tell me not to sleep on any park benches in Europe. Good advice, Dad. Good advice.
1.26.2009
Older and wiser?
1.25.2009
Oh Barrio, so much love
Friday night rocked my socks off. Well, actually I wore tights not socks although socks might have been a good idea since it dropped below zero after a balmy week of 30 degree temps but I digress...
When co-worker Tiff heard I was going to Barrio she told me that drinking one of their good sipping tequilas would be a semi-religious experience and she was right. That combined with wearing my awesome birthday dress and being with my best girls--well I knew it was going to be pretty freakin' awesome.
The girls and I scampered off to the restaurant where we were greeted by a wall of tequila bottles so full that the bartenders had to use a ladder to get to the top shelf, odd little marionette dolls danced in alcoves, and a projection screen played clips from old black and white movies. I would include the crabby hostess in that list but she didn't so much greet us as bark at me that we would have to wait until our actual reservation time (8:00pm) to be seated. It was 7:58.
An hour and 15 minutes later we still hadn't been seated and the amazingly delicious shots of repesado tequila with spicy grapefruit chasers that the manager (who introduced himself as Junior) were no longer smoothing over our impatience.
Eventually we got a rockin VIPesqe table in our very own alcove with a hilarious waitress and by then my friends, most of whom hadn't actually met before the party, were all ready to buy each other some overpriced charms for grown ups.
I was having such a good time that I kept forgetting to eat, which might explain why yesterday I had a torrid 24 hour affair with my couch and multiple bottles of water. The cat was there, ask her about it.
(Photo from Nordstrom.com)
When co-worker Tiff heard I was going to Barrio she told me that drinking one of their good sipping tequilas would be a semi-religious experience and she was right. That combined with wearing my awesome birthday dress and being with my best girls--well I knew it was going to be pretty freakin' awesome.
The girls and I scampered off to the restaurant where we were greeted by a wall of tequila bottles so full that the bartenders had to use a ladder to get to the top shelf, odd little marionette dolls danced in alcoves, and a projection screen played clips from old black and white movies. I would include the crabby hostess in that list but she didn't so much greet us as bark at me that we would have to wait until our actual reservation time (8:00pm) to be seated. It was 7:58.
An hour and 15 minutes later we still hadn't been seated and the amazingly delicious shots of repesado tequila with spicy grapefruit chasers that the manager (who introduced himself as Junior) were no longer smoothing over our impatience.
Eventually we got a rockin VIPesqe table in our very own alcove with a hilarious waitress and by then my friends, most of whom hadn't actually met before the party, were all ready to buy each other some overpriced charms for grown ups.
I was having such a good time that I kept forgetting to eat, which might explain why yesterday I had a torrid 24 hour affair with my couch and multiple bottles of water. The cat was there, ask her about it.
(Photo from Nordstrom.com)
1.23.2009
Birthday equation
Birthday celebration + 10 girls for a night out + tequila bar = trouble
There was a time when this equation would have been more than true and tonight it might still be a little bit true. The difference is that now I am wiser, older, and I know that too might time with Mr. Jose Cuervo results in waking up fully clothed with your heels still on and an entire Taco Bell burrito in your hand. What a waste of God's gift to fast food! Not that I've ever had that happen to me...
My 21st birthday was OK but I was so nervous about getting sick from partying that I made myself sick about 2 minutes after getting to the bar. Year 22 was pretty amazing; four glorious nights out in a row followed by the adoption of a certain little black and white tuxedo cat. What did I do for my 23rd? No really, what did I do? I can't remember...
This year is going to be good. I can feel it, from the tips of my new mascara to the toes of my awesome new tights.
Sidenote: The actual day is Monday but who wants to go to a tequila bar on a Monday? Well I mean, I would but I don't know if anyone would join me so tonight it is! Stories to follow next week...
There was a time when this equation would have been more than true and tonight it might still be a little bit true. The difference is that now I am wiser, older, and I know that too might time with Mr. Jose Cuervo results in waking up fully clothed with your heels still on and an entire Taco Bell burrito in your hand. What a waste of God's gift to fast food! Not that I've ever had that happen to me...
My 21st birthday was OK but I was so nervous about getting sick from partying that I made myself sick about 2 minutes after getting to the bar. Year 22 was pretty amazing; four glorious nights out in a row followed by the adoption of a certain little black and white tuxedo cat. What did I do for my 23rd? No really, what did I do? I can't remember...
This year is going to be good. I can feel it, from the tips of my new mascara to the toes of my awesome new tights.
Sidenote: The actual day is Monday but who wants to go to a tequila bar on a Monday? Well I mean, I would but I don't know if anyone would join me so tonight it is! Stories to follow next week...
1.22.2009
Fried windchill
Walking out of the gym this winter I was hit square in the face by something delicious; no, not the -15 windchill, that was cruel not yummy. What hit me was the smell of fried food; warm, delicious food; the kind of food that makes your thighs expand just smelling it. It wasn't just any fried dish that wafted around my bare neck, it was mini donuts. Getting excited about the prospect of some Tiny Tom's, state fair style, I took a step to the right and sniffed the air; nothing. Turning to the left I took a step in the opposite direction but again came up with nothing. I stepped the right again but stopped when I realized I was right outside the gym's glassed treadmill room doing what probably looked like a snowy Electric Slide or Macarena.
Shuffling down the sidewalk I thought, "It is probably for the best. I mean, I did just work out and all." But I didn't mean it. What I really meant was, "I don't care that I just worked out, I WANT MINI DONUTS." Clearly.
At the parking ramp I made sure I never looked at the stairs because if I didn't acknowledge their presence they couldn't make me feel guilty for taking the elevator. Another diet/exercise truth that ran through my head is that if the food is free the calories don't count and, according to Mentor Pam, if no one sees you eating something naughty then it never happened. Rules of the Universe; it's true stuff.
Shuffling down the sidewalk I thought, "It is probably for the best. I mean, I did just work out and all." But I didn't mean it. What I really meant was, "I don't care that I just worked out, I WANT MINI DONUTS." Clearly.
At the parking ramp I made sure I never looked at the stairs because if I didn't acknowledge their presence they couldn't make me feel guilty for taking the elevator. Another diet/exercise truth that ran through my head is that if the food is free the calories don't count and, according to Mentor Pam, if no one sees you eating something naughty then it never happened. Rules of the Universe; it's true stuff.
1.21.2009
Back to school
I wish I had heard this argument before I registered...
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2009/01/that-seems-worthwhile.html
Back to class today! Is it a problem that my book hasn't come in the mail (I found it at Amazon for $20 cheaper than at the bookstore) and I was supposed to have read three chapters before lecture tonight? Naw...no big deal.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2009/01/that-seems-worthwhile.html
Back to class today! Is it a problem that my book hasn't come in the mail (I found it at Amazon for $20 cheaper than at the bookstore) and I was supposed to have read three chapters before lecture tonight? Naw...no big deal.
1.20.2009
THE inauguration
This morning I put up a post, one I had written days ago in the event I should find myself with a blank mind some morning, but while I waited for my toast to pop in the break room I noticed the neatly folded newspaper with a historic picture on the front and realized I don't have a blank mind, I have something to say.
I am beyond excited about Barack Obama's inauguration today.
Driving into work I ran into some traffic which never happens because I take quiet side streets for most of the commute. Getting frustrated with the long wait, I did a quick detour which brought me to the bottom of a hill overlooking the river and the Minneapolis skyline. What I saw made me gasp out loud and slam on the breaks, luckily no one was behind me. Staring with my mouth hanging open I wished there was someone there to see what I saw seeing: the sunrise behind me was perfectly, brilliantly reflected on the glass and made it seem like the city was made of flames. I thought, "It looks like a magical city, like Oz. No, like Camelot!" After a few minutes of gawking I continued on my way, the sight still burning in my eyes.
This morning every city in America is being lit on fire with the prospect of hope and a fresh start, a new way of thought and the rebuilding of our country; perhaps our generation's Camelot. Will Obama be able to solve all of our problems? No, but I do believe that his inauguration is the end of one era and the beginning of the next.
In a few hours the United States will have her first African-American president and I, for one, am honored to witness this piece of history.
I am beyond excited about Barack Obama's inauguration today.
Driving into work I ran into some traffic which never happens because I take quiet side streets for most of the commute. Getting frustrated with the long wait, I did a quick detour which brought me to the bottom of a hill overlooking the river and the Minneapolis skyline. What I saw made me gasp out loud and slam on the breaks, luckily no one was behind me. Staring with my mouth hanging open I wished there was someone there to see what I saw seeing: the sunrise behind me was perfectly, brilliantly reflected on the glass and made it seem like the city was made of flames. I thought, "It looks like a magical city, like Oz. No, like Camelot!" After a few minutes of gawking I continued on my way, the sight still burning in my eyes.
This morning every city in America is being lit on fire with the prospect of hope and a fresh start, a new way of thought and the rebuilding of our country; perhaps our generation's Camelot. Will Obama be able to solve all of our problems? No, but I do believe that his inauguration is the end of one era and the beginning of the next.
In a few hours the United States will have her first African-American president and I, for one, am honored to witness this piece of history.
1.19.2009
MLK
Caley: Mom, no school on Monday!
Mom: Really? Why?
Caley: It's King Luther's birthday!
Circa 1st grade
I might have had a little problem with syntax as a 6 year old but I think I've got it right now...
Happy Martin Luther King Jr. day!
Mom: Really? Why?
Caley: It's King Luther's birthday!
Circa 1st grade
I might have had a little problem with syntax as a 6 year old but I think I've got it right now...
Happy Martin Luther King Jr. day!
1.16.2009
The Black Cat Salon
Does your hair need an updated look? Are you stuck in 2008? Just want to feel and look great? Consider visiting The Black Cat Salon, featuring head stylist Ebony "Ebbie" Fifi Manolo. With 9 years of experience you have nothing to fear when Ebbie does your hair!
Customer reviews:
"I could tell she really cared about me, not just my hair." -JoAnn
"It was so relaxing, she really made me comfortable." -Cal
"My hair looked like a nest. Ebbie made me feel so much better about myself!"
-Kelsey (seen in video)
Still don't know if The Black Cat Salon is for you? Check out this video and your doubts will disappear.

To book your appointment, please use the comment section and know that Ebbie is very much looking forward to seeing you at The Black Cat Salon (located at The Stanford House).
Customer reviews:
"I could tell she really cared about me, not just my hair." -JoAnn
"It was so relaxing, she really made me comfortable." -Cal
"My hair looked like a nest. Ebbie made me feel so much better about myself!"
-Kelsey (seen in video)
Still don't know if The Black Cat Salon is for you? Check out this video and your doubts will disappear.
To book your appointment, please use the comment section and know that Ebbie is very much looking forward to seeing you at The Black Cat Salon (located at The Stanford House).
1.15.2009
Mirage, anyone?
For weeks I, along with all of my coworkers, have been complaining about how flippin dry it is in the office.
It's so dry that I can chug water all day long and not have to go to pee until about 4:00pm. (Sidenote: Maybe Dolce should work here to help with the constant pregnancy induced bathroom trips? Hmm...)
It's so dry that my lips look like an ice rink post-hockey game/pre-Zamboni.
It's so dry that I put olive oil on my skin TWICE a day and it still feels like I sat out on the beach too long and fried my forehead.
While those descriptions are very accurate and paint a wonderful picture of exactly how dry it is here, some people might need a more quantitative measure. For you, I have this:
One of my coworkers has a little hygrometer and according to her nifty difty device the humidity in our office is 18%.
Average relative humidity in the Sahara desesrt is 25%.
Did I mention it's a little dry in here?
It's so dry that I can chug water all day long and not have to go to pee until about 4:00pm. (Sidenote: Maybe Dolce should work here to help with the constant pregnancy induced bathroom trips? Hmm...)
It's so dry that my lips look like an ice rink post-hockey game/pre-Zamboni.
It's so dry that I put olive oil on my skin TWICE a day and it still feels like I sat out on the beach too long and fried my forehead.
While those descriptions are very accurate and paint a wonderful picture of exactly how dry it is here, some people might need a more quantitative measure. For you, I have this:
One of my coworkers has a little hygrometer and according to her nifty difty device the humidity in our office is 18%.

Average relative humidity in the Sahara desesrt is 25%.

Did I mention it's a little dry in here?
1.14.2009
Delurking week?
More FBI agents
While enjoying the free drinks provided at our DC hotel's happy hour, Sister, Odie, Mom, Glor and I were in awe of all of the hot guys wandering the lobby. FBI agents with radio ear pieces and badges, Army officers with their cool pins, and even a few suspected CIA guys passed by us as we tried not to stare. Then the guy I had scoped out at breakfast in a totally non-stalker "Oooo he likes oatmeal with brown sugar and raisins just like me" kind of way showed up. Sister, Odie and I happened to be grabbing some more hors d'oeuvres (aka cubes of cheese, potato chips and popcorn) when he appeared and all started whispering about how good looking he was. My whispers may have been more like slightly muted shouts, given that he turned around and caught us staring after I said, "No, he is definitely the hottest one here." I didn't really care though because as I said back at the table when we saw him leaving, "He's so hot he could totally be in the FBI calendar."
Remind me again why I live in Minnesota where there are no FBI agents (except for the ones I became friends with at Halloween after deciding to steal their suits), no military men in uniform and definitely no CIA agents (although I suppose they might be here and I just wouldn't know it)? Ugh.
ADDENDUM: Sister posted this in the comments but it was just too priceless not to be included here...
Mom: "He's married"
CA Sister: "Ya? So am I!!!"
CA Sister: "Did you hear, sis? He's got a ring on"
MN Sister: "It could be part of the disguise...you know - to throw people off??"
CA Sister: "That's EXACTLY what I said to Mom"
CA Sister: How come I didn't get to put dibbs on any of the beefcakes? Because of my ring?
MN Sister: Um, yes.
Remind me again why I live in Minnesota where there are no FBI agents (except for the ones I became friends with at Halloween after deciding to steal their suits), no military men in uniform and definitely no CIA agents (although I suppose they might be here and I just wouldn't know it)? Ugh.
ADDENDUM: Sister posted this in the comments but it was just too priceless not to be included here...
Mom: "He's married"
CA Sister: "Ya? So am I!!!"
CA Sister: "Did you hear, sis? He's got a ring on"
MN Sister: "It could be part of the disguise...you know - to throw people off??"
CA Sister: "That's EXACTLY what I said to Mom"
CA Sister: How come I didn't get to put dibbs on any of the beefcakes? Because of my ring?
MN Sister: Um, yes.
1.13.2009
A high temp of -4°F?
DC, again?
In grade school, Dad took me to Washington DC for a long weekend. What was the occasion? I have no idea. How long did we stay? Not really sure. What historic sites did we visit? Um...
At this point you might ask, "What DO you remember?"
Well, if you were to ask me my answer might be, "The brand new rockin pair of brown tights I wore the whole weekend and the awesome plaid jumper with a matching turtleneck that I wore with those rocking brown tights."
Yeah, I've always been cultured, refined, and...oh whatever.
At this point you might ask, "What DO you remember?"
Well, if you were to ask me my answer might be, "The brand new rockin pair of brown tights I wore the whole weekend and the awesome plaid jumper with a matching turtleneck that I wore with those rocking brown tights."
Yeah, I've always been cultured, refined, and...oh whatever.
1.12.2009
Where has the time gone?
Checking out some other blogs I've seen a lot of "year in review" type posts. I hadn't planned on doing anything like that but now that I start to think about it, I've had a pretty big year. Here are a few things that happened...
-ended things with my first (and only, to date) post-college boyfriend
-visited Chicago for the first time and fell in love with it
(Touring the city with our "Kiki and Lettie Reunion Tour" t-shirts...I am Kiki, she is Lettie, in case you were wondering)
-got my first ever real life grown up big girl job
-took a week off for the first time in a year and spent it by a pool in AZ
-bought a piano
-dated two guys at the same time (for what was the first and I have vowed to be the only time)
-did a party bus (again, first and hopefully only time ever)
(Aboard "The White Tiger" wearing my cute leopard pumps)
-went to more art fairs this summer than all the rest combined
(St. Anthony Fall's Art Fair, Mississippi River with Mom)
-became a published author
-remodeled the bathroom
-took my first business trip
-spent time with Grandpa before he died and attended his burial with full military honors at Arlington
-drove a tractor
-had my first Thanksgiving with champagne in CA with Sister
-had the second worst hangover of my life after champagne Thanksgiving in CA with Sister (for the record, the worst of all time was also with Sister after a holida in CA...hmm)
-started grad school
-got almost 100% in my first grad school class
-tried frozen yogurt and became obsessed
-shot skeet and rocked at it
-saw some great concerts
(Grandstand, MN State Fair, Brad Paisley concert)
-went to the ER for the first time (at least the first time in the US)
-started blogging again (almost) every day!
-ended things with my first (and only, to date) post-college boyfriend
-visited Chicago for the first time and fell in love with it
(Touring the city with our "Kiki and Lettie Reunion Tour" t-shirts...I am Kiki, she is Lettie, in case you were wondering)-got my first ever real life grown up big girl job
-took a week off for the first time in a year and spent it by a pool in AZ
-bought a piano
-dated two guys at the same time (for what was the first and I have vowed to be the only time)
-did a party bus (again, first and hopefully only time ever)
(Aboard "The White Tiger" wearing my cute leopard pumps)-went to more art fairs this summer than all the rest combined
(St. Anthony Fall's Art Fair, Mississippi River with Mom)-became a published author
-remodeled the bathroom
-took my first business trip
-spent time with Grandpa before he died and attended his burial with full military honors at Arlington
-drove a tractor
-had my first Thanksgiving with champagne in CA with Sister
-had the second worst hangover of my life after champagne Thanksgiving in CA with Sister (for the record, the worst of all time was also with Sister after a holida in CA...hmm)
-started grad school
-got almost 100% in my first grad school class
-tried frozen yogurt and became obsessed
-shot skeet and rocked at it
-saw some great concerts
(Grandstand, MN State Fair, Brad Paisley concert)-went to the ER for the first time (at least the first time in the US)
-started blogging again (almost) every day!
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