Monsters in the dark

You guys, it's happening: bugs are taking over the world. Last night I was snuggled in my warm, comfy bed with the ceiling fan running at exactly the right speed and a perfect new song playing on repeat when I heard the cat freaking out in the living room. FREAKING OUT. Batting at the blinds, meowing, jumping around. 

When I got up to check on her, I saw it. IT. A horrifying dragon dinosaur alien bug creature.* It had pincers. Big ones. And it's underside was all scaly. {These pics don't do it justice.}

After trying to flick it off the screen unsuccessfully, I gave up and went back to bed only to be dive-bombed by a kamakaze fly the size of a dime. Never have I seen a mutant freak of a fly that big.

Of course when I leaped up on the bed I got light headed from standing too fast. Almost lost my hand to that lovely ceiling fan and nearly fell off the bed trying to nunchuck it to death with a cardigan {it was the closest thing I could grab.}

I'm telling you...they're taking over.

*Someone on twitter informed it was an earwig. Eeeeew.