Holiday ER visits

The lovely Dolce recently told a story on her blog about a slightly out of control Christmas party. It reminded me of a Christmas break (or maybe it was Easter...) a few years back when the guy I was dating took a little late night trip to the ER.

At the time I was still an EMT. Whenever any of my friends got a boo-boo they called me so it wasn't too much of a surprise when ex-BF called to ask for some medical advice. His voice sounded scratchy as he started talking, "Um, ok so funny story. I swallowed a bottle cap." He paused and I waited for the funny part of the story. "And it is stuck in my throat."
"Are you serious? That isn't even close to funny. How did you swallow a bottle cap? Wait no, scratch that, don't talk anymore. You need to go to the ER. If it shifts you won't be able to breathe."
"What? No. I think I can get it up, I already tried throwing up a few times but all that came up was blood."
"Ohmygodpleasestoprightnow. Don't do that again. Please. Go to the ER. Trust me." Of course, he didn't trust me and insisted on having his brother call the ER nurse line to ask them if he should bring in his "little brother who swallowed a bottle cap." When the nurse insisted he should, they finally loaded up and headed off to the hospital. Apparently the doctor laughed when he walked into the exam room, not expecting the "little brother" to be a 20 year old 6'4" drunk guy who had swallowed the bottle cap during a drinking game at a Christmas party. The throat specialist doctor who had to be called in after midnight during a holiday week didn't so much laugh.
That year for his birthday I gave him a card covered in bottle caps and baked him a cake. Inside the card it said something to the effect of, "One of these things you eat and the other you do not. Think you're old enough to tell the difference now?"
Oh holiday parties.